|David Furnish, Elton John, & Child (with a nod to Van Eyck)|
I want a baby. I have dreamed of being a dad ever since I was about thirteen. I even remember playing 'family' with my brother, putting on my blue blazer and emulating our own father in our room while we were supposed to be tidying up. This is a role I feel called to; something I was born to want. And I believe fatherhood and parenting goes well beyond passing on a DNA structure, but instead passing on values and a way of living. I want to inspire and help to form a young person into a healthy and admired adult.
Being gay instantly makes parenthood political. Most people probably don't think about this, but it is difficult and expensive to adopt a child as a homosexual, and completely illegal in many states, even in 2011. Add to that the stacks of 'evidence' against us and our 'wayward' and 'alternative' lifestyle and it can take years a lot of court dates to adopt a child and create a family. Unless of course you are Elton John and David Furnish, who I'm sure had to deal with their own fair share of red tape. Good luck to you both as parents. And know that I envy you, not only for the relationship you have with each other, but also for the good fortune of being parents.
Until I am blessed with a stable and loving companion - that isn't a pug - and before I can even begin to really think about the prospect of fatherhood, I get to bask in the warmth that is being an uncle. Because my sister and brother-in-law blessed our family with a perfect little girl named Eliza. I am beside myself. I hope she will love me the same way I instantly loved her. Dear Eliza, I can't wait to watch you grow up. In a way that you may never know, you saved my life. I will always be in your debt.
In the long run, I know I will be a father someday. There are a lot of battles for me to fight before that can be a realistic prospect. I am twenty six. My career is only a few steps out the starting gate. And there is still that issue of nabbing a good boyfriend. Evidently, they are hard to come by. But I still want a baby.